Saturday, January 17, 2009

A Good Week

It was a good week, without a doubt. The deep freeze settled into the city, and having a job where you're outside for six hours of the day, three days of the week, is not exactly the easiest thing to have, but it was truly a wild adventure. I don't know why, but I'm falling in love with this city again, and I don't think it's because the citizens of Toronto are rewarding my faith in their genorosity by making contributions to the cause (or at least it is simply not that) Maybe it was the decision to build here (a decision which a lot of people are happy about, and I'm grateful for that) Or it could be that the simple changing of my schedule to Monday, Wednesday and Friday has found me well rested for every shift (and trust, if I'm well-rested, there's no limit to what I can do, whether it is with this job, or in my art) All I know is that on Friday, the coldest day of the year, I was outside and I couldn't stop laughing. Wind Chill burning through my body and I was simply laughing throughout my entire shift (however long it did last) Maybe I just figured out something - of how I can make this truly home, and because of that, I have a lot more opportunity to stretch out beyond these particular borders, because I finally decided to settle here. Montreal is still there (and as I said previously, I will be there a lot every single year as long as I'm alive) but the crucial thing is that I am more here than I ever was. There is something to that idea which I am still learning of, and I don't know what will come of this understanding, but what I do know is that I love the feeling. And this show only needs two months of physical transformation (which, my rescheduling, has further compelled) I've waited this long, so I don't mind a couple of more weeks, and with my decision to stay, I may not leave my job fully just yet (I can take a week off here, and a week off there indefinitely) The fact that every single day when I go out to work, I don't have to worry about coming into work the next day, has absolutely freed me. I can go out dancing, or find sarahjane and work with her, or sit in my favourite hangouts and write and find strangers and lovers and old friends, and not worry about the time I will be coming home, because the next day I have plenty of time to sleep, and plenty of time to train (and it is so much easier of a thing to train, and to love, when you are paying your bills on time, and saving up plenty for the madness ahead) Yes, it was a good week, most definitely (and I can't wait to get started on the next one...)